(no subject)

[j3nii]

i feel.. i feel like im gonna break down any minute. i dont know when.. and i dont know how.. but any moment.. just any moment

 

im going to crack.

AND SMASH EVERYTHING IN THE GODDAMN ROOM BEFORE I RUN INTO A SPEEDING FUCKING HIGHWAY TO TRY AND KILL MYSELF

fuck god. fuck school. fuck those ugly littel trees my dad planted in the "backyard" the other day. fuck those sappy lovey dovey movies and disney movies that can always make me cry. fuck all these guys who pretend like they're "there for me" for some stupid reason that i have nfi about. fuck this stupid math test and physics assignment and art bullshit and that stupid fucking macbeth thing that i havent started yet. fuck everybody who hates me. fuck those STUPID salad menu mcdonalds people who give just that teeny amount less dressing that you  fucking need for a dodgy rip off garden salad. fuck those ugly stupid commercials that get stuck in your head. fuck all the little brothers in the world. fuck those people who think theyre better than everybody else. fuck those people who dont have a life and choose to hang around losers cos losers are the only people they can fucking cling to. fuck STUPID FUCKING SCHOOL FOR HAVING A PROBLEM AND MAKING FOUR WHOLE FUCKING YEARS OF BLUDGING AND DUMP ALL THIS BULLSHIT THAT WE WOULDA UNDERSTOOD IF U TAUGHT US IN YEAR SEVEN INSTEAD OF FUCKING YR ELEVEN YOU BITCHES.

fuck.. just fuck. fuck people. fuck ugly math equations. fuck coordinate geometry. fuck you. fuck the person next to you. fuck that person that hangs outside your bedroom window.

fuck boys for having NFI WHAT THEY WANT FOR THEYRE STUPID BIRTHDAY THATS IN FOUR FUCKING DAYS. =_=

 

i just wish i was in primary school again. even if it was sacred heart. even if i did get into trouble for talking alot. i wish i was in year 5 again. no boys. i didnt like boys. boys had "jimmy germs". boys were at pooftas paradise two whole suburbs away. i still lived in cabramatta. i still had my dog. i didnt care about anything as such. there was no self image. i had mrs scott as my teacher. i always finished my work. the work was easy. i could spell. i didnt have the internet. i had FUCKING CABLE. x_x.

i didnt have to worry about what that guy is thinking of me. how to get prettier. how ugly i am and how impossible it is for me to "get prettier". i didnt have to think about what comes first in the general equation of a fucking line perpendicular to the tangent of a cubic function when intersecting with an inverse parabola to the log of 6.

and right now.. im nearly finishing school.. my dad keeps on reminding me.. "just a couple more weeks, 48 or 49... and then you'll have your exams.. and itll all be over. just dont regret. u cant regret. its your fautl if you dont listen to me now. and if u get shit, you cant do anything about it. so dont regret. prevent yourself from regretting. just get over this mountain in your life and the rest will be a cruise ride. you'll be happy. you'll have money. you'll have chiuldren and a rich husband."

fuck i want to die.

Comments

[janfoolery.livejournal.com]

:0 I was like that a few minutes ago, when my brother burped in my face WHILE I WAS DOING LEGAL ASS. Fucking cunt. And he's always making obscene noises and is.. just fucking fucked up

[bananamandodado.livejournal.com]

uhuh! we all wish we could just crawl into a dark hole and just live away from the rest of the world. with a tv. maybe one of those hot chocolate machines at school. a doona. and errr of course all of you guys would be there and we'd just watch movies and done absolutely friggin nothing all day! hehehe...truly bliss

[kazumaru.livejournal.com]

you say 'fuck' and variations of 'fuck' 33 times in your entire entry

<3 i love you, please cheer up! ^__^

[the--impaler.livejournal.com]

wow... i cant say i feel your pain, but it is worldwide known fact that year 11 and 12 are the HARDEST years of your LIFE. after that it actually is a breeze compared to the pressure you feel during those two years. and dont worry about guys not caring/ knowing what they want. fuck im 18 and i didnt give a shit what people gave me for the past 6 years. we all want to go back to primary school.... and sorry if im invading a private girls (bein a guy) bitchin corner....